Ranking the seasons: Dexter

The fifth installment of Showtime’s serial killer saga, “Dexter”, delivered the highest ratings yet, and the show was already the most watched in network history, so we can probably assume the series will go as long as star Michael C. Hall remains interested.  (Fun fact: Hall’s marriage to co-star Jennifer Carpenter [AKA Dexter's sister Deb] is apparently headed for divorce, which could add some extra tension to the set as both will be back next year.)  But, ratings aside, how did this season stack up to the rest on a scale of 1 to awesome? Let’s rank them shits.

1. Season One
Primary Season Long Arc: The Ice Truck Killer
Dexter’s Love Interest: Rita
Deb’s Love Interest: Rudy
The Gist: “Tonight’s the night.” The bright colors of Miami  juxtapose with the detached, sardonic voice over – the Dexter deadpan.  Enter Dexter Morgan – blood spatter forensics expert by day, blood spattering serial killer by night.  He’s cleaning up the streets of Florida the old fashioned way – by dumping garbage bags full of the mutilated bodies of criminals into the Atlantic.  The clash of styles between the emotionless Dexter and the flair of Miami’s culture – from loud music to loud shirts – were still new and exciting in the first season.   These style elements eventually became routine, but what really cements the debut season as a clear number 1 was a plot that was mysterious not only on the surface level of the twists and turns of the Ice Truck Killer case, but in terms of digging into Dexter’s past and uncovering something that fundamentally changes his interpretation of his own identity.  It was almost an origin story that pieced itself together in flashbacks over the course of the season. The writers would try to repeat this in future seasons but would ultimately fail to satisfy.

2. Season Four
Primary Season Long Arc: The Trinity Killer
Dexter’s Love Interest: Rita (married)
Deb’s Love Interest: Anton and Lundy
The Gist: Dexter’s 4th installment is best known for the shock of the season’s cliffhanger ending – Dexter returning home to find his wife, Rita, murdered in the bathtub.  The season also had another shocking death earlier in the year as Agent Lundy is shot and killed in the middle of a conversation with Deb.  It’s probably those dramatic exits of 2 longtime characters that push this season just above the rest of the pack, but John Lithgow made a decent serial killer in his guest stint as well.

3. Season Three
Primary Season Long Arc: DA Miguel Prado gets hands on with some perps
Dexter’s Love Interest: Rita (engaged)
Deb’s Love Interest: Anton
The Gist: The 3rd season is nuts.  Somehow Dexter becomes a serial killing mentor to district attorney Miguel Prado, played by Jimmy Smits.  Despite the goofiness of the DA/serial killer tandem-ing, I actually liked Smits.  Eventually, though, the conflict that arises between him and Dexter gets a little melodramatic and seems to drag on for too long before it finally resolves itself in a completely predictable fashion.  A lot of the side stories really started to get annoying this year, too – like Deb banging the partially skinned club musician,  Anton (David Ramsey).  During those scenes I was hoping Miguel and Dexter would burst into my actual house and put me out of my misery.

4. Season Five
Primary Season Long Arc: Jordan Chase and friends
Dexter’s Love Interest: Lumen
Deb’s Love Interest: Quinn
The Gist: When I first heard that Julia Stiles was going to guest star on Dexter’s 5th season, I said: “The bad news is that Julia Stiles is guest starring on Dexter next season.  The good news is that Dexter will murder her. “ More bad news:  He didn’t!  Instead he had sexual relations with her several times and helped her overcome a lot of her PTSD issues through the healing power of stab-murdering a bunch of bad guys.  At this point some of the show’s staple elements are really starting to fall flat.  Dexter’s conversations with imaginary (and/or ghost) Harry have progressed from interesting in season 1 to not so interesting in season 3 and 4 to actually pretty annoying in season 5, for one example.

5. Season Two
Primary Season Long Arc: The Bay Harbor Butcher
Dexter’s Love Interest: Rita and Lila
Deb’s Love Interest: Agent Lundy
The Gist: Dexter’s bags of bodies are discovered and the heat is on. Everyone is looking for the Bay Harbor Butcher, including the FBI. Dexter also starts going to alocholics anonymous type meetings where he explores the idea of his “dark passenger” and befriends a crazy person with a ridiculous East End accent named Lila.  Dexter wastes little time as he and Lila really hit it off, by which I mean Lila takes her clothes off and Dexter hits it.  Later he kills her.  Also, she was super annoying, and that’s the sole reason this season ranks last.

Pass or Fail: Grading NBC’s Trailers Pt 2

Outlaw

Jimmy Smits is a hotshot lawyer who plays by his own rules… but he gets results! I’m glad to see that NBC is going for a fresh take on the courtroom drama. I haven’t seen a hotshot lawyer play by his own rules like this since every other courtroom drama on tv (plus House is the same thing, just set in a hospital). It also reveals the conclusion of the pilot in the trailer, which seems like a dumb move. There’s a moment where, as Jimmy Smits is loose-cannoning around his apartment, he is slapping a baseball bat against his palm for no good reason. For a split second, I thought it was a gigantic black dildo. That was the best part of this trailer.

Fail

Chase

This is a straightforward US Marshals show. They intend the hook to be the hard boiled female lead, but this is not a hook. At this point, it’s a cliche.

Fail

Harry’s Law

Kathy Bates is a hotshot lawyer who plays by her own rules… but she gets results! The opening of this trailer is awesome (what’s not to like about Kathy Bates tootin’ on a big ol’ hogleg?), but it starts to lose me when it says “from the creator of Ally McBeal”. And what’s with these lawyer shows revealing the end of the pilot? They’re basically just letting you know that every episode will be completely predictable.

Close Pass

The Cape

I don’t even know what to say about this one… a superhero trained by secret underground circus folk, with a magical cape that he uses as a weapon. The idea that his family wouldn’t recognize him in his superhero get up would be a lot easier to swallow if the show were called The Mask.

Fail

School Pride

It’s Extreme Home Makeover for schools. I’m not into that show, but this seems like a better premise for people that are into that kind of thing. Also, mold is gross, so I’ll give a pass to any show that involves network money being spent on mold removal.

Pass

And the Emmy should go to…

The big list of potential Emmy nominees is out for the acting categories, and though the ceremony is still a few months away here are our nominees and winners.  Thanks to Alan Sepinwall for the idea.

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Comedy Series

Ken Marino* – Party Down
Alec Baldwin – 30 Rock
Adrian Grenier – Entourage
Lee Pace – Pushing Daisies
Danny McBride – Eastbound & Down

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Drama Series

Bryan Cranston* – Breaking Bad
Gabriel Byrne – In Treatment
Michael C. Hall – Dexter
Jon Hamm – Mad Men
Edward James Olmos – Battlestar Galactica

Outstanding Lead Actress In A Comedy Series

Tina Fey* – 30 Rock
Toni Collette – United States of Tara
Sarah Silverman – The Sarah Silverman Program
Cheryl Hines – In Motherhood
Julia Louis-Dreyfus – The New Adventures of Old Christine

Outstanding Lead Actress In A Drama Series

January Jones* – Mad Men
Emily Deschanel – Bones
Molly Parker – Swingtown
Elisabeth Moss – Mad Men
Mary McDonnell – Battlestar Galactica

Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Comedy Series

Kevin Dillon* – Entourage
Ryan Hansen – Party Down
NPH – How I Met Your Mother
Ed Helms – The Office
Rainn Wilson – The Office

Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Drama Series

John Noble* – Fringe
Walton Goggins – The Shield
Michael Hogan – Battlestar Galactica
James Callis – Battlestar Galactica
Aaron Paul – Breaking Bad

Outstanding Supporting Actress In A Comedy Series

Jane Lynch* – Party Down
Rosemarie Dewitt – United States of Tara
Alyson Hannigan – How I Met Your Mother
Jane Krakowski – 30 Rock
Mindy Kaling – The Office

Outstanding Supporting Actress In A Drama Series

Anna Gunn* – Breaking Bad
Elizabeth Mitchell – Lost
Tricia Helfer – Battlestar Galactica
Christina Hendricks – Mad Men
Dichen Lachman – Dollhouse

Outstanding Guest Actor In A Comedy Series

Dean Winters* – 30 Rock
Ed Begley, Jr. – Party Down
Peter Dinklage – 30 Rock
Chris Parnell – 30 Rock
Nate Corddry – United States of Tara

Outstanding Guest Actor In A Drama Series

Jimmy Smits* – Dexter
Dean Stockwell – Battlestar Galactica
Alan Dale – Lost
Charles Durning – Rescue Me
Stephen Root – True Blood

Outstanding Guest Actress In A Comedy Series

Kristen Bell* – Party Down
Amy Ryan – The Office
Jessica St. Clair – United States of Tara
Salma Hayek – 30 Rock
Phoebe Strole – 30 Rock

Outstanding Guest Actress In A Drama Series

Kate Vernon* – Battlestar Galactica
Frances Fisher – The Shield
Rekha Sharma – Battlestar Galactica
Kristen Bell – Heroes
Lizzy Caplan – True Blood